Admit Your Weaknesses

Dr. Ron Jenson - Author of "Make a Life, Not just a Living".

Admit Your Weaknesses, Admit shortcomings to yourself, to others (in the appropriate context), and to God as you know him. Just learn to admit them. Denial exacerbates the problem.

Everyone develops what I call a "box" sense of maturity. We believe that if we live according to a certain socially acceptable "box," then we are accepted and can rise in position or respectability. All of us have certain peer groups that establish the limits of acceptable and unacceptable dres and behavior. Those limits put us in a box. When we measure ourselves against this "box," our focus becomes our external lifestyle, not our internal growth. Consequently, we stop addressing or even being aware of our weaknesses.

I remember once sitting down with a friend who was struggling with worry. I said to him, "What's your greatest problem?" He said, "Money."

I looked at him and laughed. I said, "You're kidding."

"No. Why do you say I'm kidding?"

"In my view, money's not your biggest problem."
"Then what is my biggest problem?"

"It's worry."

He paled. This man worked with a group of people who didn't think worry was acceptable behavior. He said, rather frantically, "Worry? I don't worry. You're wrong. You've got to be wrong!"

"Everybody knows you worry," I said. "Your wife knows you worry. I know you worry. Anyone who meets you for five minutes knows you worry. Your stomach knows you worry. You have an ulcer. Of course you worry! What you need to hear is that it's okay - yes, okay to worry. You're not a bad person because you worry. You just don't realize that you don't need to worry."

It's okay to be impatient sometimes. It's okay if we say things we shouldn't say sometimes. I'm not glad to be full of flaws. But I recognize - and so should you - that everyone is struggling with something, and it's okay to admin it. In fact, the first principle in growth is to say, "I am helpless. I really mean am weak and I need help."

Most of us are great con artists. We pretend to be someone we're really not, and we end up playing a game all our lives. Paul Tournier said, "We can conceal our persons behind a protective barrier. We let it be seen only through the bars. We display certain of its aspects. Others we carefully hide."